February 2012
2 posts
MP
I served my local MP at work tonight. His name’s Chris White, he’s Conservative.
He seemed in a good mood. Handing over the DVD he’d chosen, he asked, ‘Have you seen it? Is it any good?’
I’d watched this particular movie when it came out. It was enjoyable, but didn’t really have any depth in the characters or plot. That wasn’t necessarily a bad...
An Announcement about my Dad
For people who don’t know, my dad, Peter Cruden, sadly passed away on the 2nd of February after a brief illness. We’d known it was coming for a couple of weeks, but the rate at which it happened was still a shock. He was 57.
There was an overwhelming response to the news of Dad’s illness, from old friends and colleagues, and it really touched him in his final days to know how...
January 2012
5 posts
I’m cringing a bit at the fact that I just blogged about Doctor Who and Sherlock. How very Tumblr of me. I’ll post a bunch of captioned GIFs from a cult TV show/movie next.
My thoughts on Sherlock/Doctor Who
Sherlock was a bit good, eh? It’s like Doctor Who for grown ups.
That’s not to say that Doctor Who is for children, but a lot of adults seem to think it is, so they don’t watch it. I don’t understand this— if people like Sherlock, they’d probably genuinely enjoy Doctor Who as well.
Sherlock and Doctor Who have very similar lead characters— both...
Wordfeud
I’m about to complete my first game of Wordfeud with my friend Emilie. It’s one of those phone Scrabble games that are very popular at the moment. I don’t remember Scrabble ever being as addictive as this.
Anyway, Emilie is winning, which is bad because English isn’t her first language.
What’s even worse is she keeps coming out with words I’ve never heard of....
Ow.
I pulled muscles in my neck at the gym today.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. I was probably working very hard to maintain this slamming bod, so you’re not surprised I strain myself sometimes. But it wasn’t that.
It was my first session for a few weeks. I assumed that the gym would be full of New Years resolution-ers who would probably disappear after the first week of January, but it was dead...
Bank Holiday
Bank holidays: they’re everywhere at the moment. I think today (January 2nd) is the last one for a fair while though. Anyway, this abundance of bank holidays got me thinking about one of my finest moments.
You know that feeling on a bank holiday when you want to go to a shop or something similar, but you can’t work out if it’s the kind of place that would be open? I get that all...
December 2011
3 posts
Getting my watch battery changed
The guy in Timpsons was struggling to get the back off my watch, and kept chattering in a thick Geordie accent.
Watch man: What do you do for a living?
Me: Haha, yeah... (six or so seconds later) ...what?
Student Loan
This weekend, I received my first letter from Student Finance since graduating. They said that my loan was due for repayment, beginning in April. They didn’t specify the amount, but I think it’s somewhere in the region of £21,000.
I don’t actually have to pay any of it back until I’m earning over a certain amount (£15,000 a year I think). Hopefully, I will be earning that...
November 2011
5 posts
Phase one, complete!
I got a short story published in a collection! Huzzah!
It’s a story called ‘The Lost Art of Seduction’, which I wrote for university and actually posted on here a while back. Before you ask, because everyone does, no it’s not based on a true story.
This publication is important for a number of reasons.
One: it proves to me that I am actually alright at writing, no matter...
At work
Paul: That walk home will do you good. You don't get any exercise otherwise do you?
Me: I go to the gym now! Twice a week!
Paul: (Pats my belly) I think you should up it to three times a week.
October 2011
6 posts
Boobs
When I wake up, and my brain isn’t working properly yet, I make myself some coffee and toast and put the TV on. It doesn’t matter what’s on, I just need some moving pictures and noises to wake me up. More often than not, though, I watch This Morning.
As I ate my toast, Phil and Holly Willoughby (aka Willy Holloby) were talking to a large group of women about the importance of...
Attack the Block
I saw Joe Cornish’s hoody-alien-comedy, Attack the Block, back when it was in cinemas and thought it was great. I was a little disappointed at first, as I thought it was going to be more of a gag-fest, like Shaun of the Dead. But when I’d come around to the fact that the humour was more subtle and focussed on the quick, clever dialogue, I really enjoyed it.
Something I’ve learnt...
A little anecdote I just remembered.
Six years ago, I worked at Woolworths. I was only there for three months and hated it.
There was one guy who generally worked similar shifts to me, but on a different till. His name was Ignacio, but everybody called him Nacho. He was Spanish, and I still can’t work out if this nickname was racially insensitive. He was a big guy, with a constant dopey look on his face and a limited grasp on...
The King's Speech
I was on the open at work today.
One of the first customers we had was a tall, foreign sounding bloke. He strolled up to my counter in a very cheerful manner for 10am on a Saturday.
‘I bought this copy of The King’s Speech yesterday,’ he said, ‘but it skips in the middle. Can I have a different one?’
I had a quick look at the disc and there were a few marks, so I...
September 2011
8 posts
Crazy JJB Lady
I have an induction session booked at the gym tomorrow. Yes, me in a gym, har har very funny I know. I like doing exercise, it makes my brain work more, but I get very little at the moment, so gym it is! With this in mind, I needed to buy some gymwear so I look my best when I’m pumping these guns.
I left it very late in the day to go to town. People who follow this blog, or my twitter, or...
I got a package in the post the other day.
It was a STUFFED TIGER. As in like, a toy. It wasn’t a taxidermy delivery. I’m not sure taxidermists even deliver. Anywho, it looks like this:
Grr. Cute eh? And why did someone send me a cuddly tiger? Because I’m too nice.
No, really. Too nice.
I was approached by a WWF charity mugger type a month ago and, since I’m too polite to just ignore people, I chatted to her....
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
I went to the cinema yesterday to see All-Star-Cold-War-Spy-Thriller flick, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. It’s a bit complicated. Like, I might need to see it a few more times, accompanied by some kind of Sparknotes, a basic knowledge of the cold war and somebody who can explain what’s happening, type complicated. I was going to pretend to Grace that I understood every second and it was...
Once again, this bitch needs to be kick-started. Is that a phrase?
My blog is my favourite thing to write, and ideas only pop into my head when interesting (and generally embarrassing) things happen to me. My excuse for not writing as much recently is that bugger all has been going on in my post-university life.
However, recently, I was thinking about the poet Emily Dickinson. Dickinson lived in...
Starbucks replied.
Dear Alex, Thank you for taking the time to contact Starbucks Coffee Company with your suggestion for a new Christmas dinner inspired drink, it sounds delicious and is a very creative way to enjoy a British favorite on the go. Our range is regularly reviewed to ensure it offers a varied selection of quality beverages and we value customer feedback about our menu. As part of this process we also...
I'm super bored so I sent this to Starbucks UK.
Dear Starbucks,
Now that we’re half way through September, people are begrudgingly becoming aware of the fact that Christmas is lurking around the corner. The cold weather, financial strain and prospect of spending time with one’s family can drain people and make them feel deflated. One redeeming factor of the holiday season, to use a horrible Americanism, is the arrival of your...
“Right, this is ridiculous now. I need to get back into blogging mode! Any...”
August 2011
1 post
Criminal
I was in Newcastle last week, visiting my mum. The riots in London were still unfolding at this point, and beginning to spread further north. My mum and I chatted about the crazy violence on the telly and made jokes about how, as my parent, she had a responsibility to ensure that I upheld the law. We both laughed because we know how much of a good boy I am.
On Wednesday, I decided to take a trip...
July 2011
4 posts
Jib.
When I watch ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’, I start to think and sometimes talk like Larry David. In last night’s episode (the first of season eight, finally!), Larry used the phrase ‘I like the cut of your jib!’
Today, I went to Starbucks to do some reading and writing. The girl behind the till was friendly and asked how my day was. I shrugged, said it was alright, and...
Ten days post-shave.
We’ve reached the end of the road.
This is the longest I’ve gone without shaving, and I’ve finally reached the conclusion that I can’t grow a proper beard.
I was so close to shaving it all off last night. Anna said that it’d look quite good if I could grow a full face of stubble, but it had gone past that stage and now just looked like I was failing to grow a beard....
Eight and nine days post-shave
I’m sort of getting used to having a beard, albeit a slightly pathetic one. Growth wise, it’s still going, but not much further than the image in my last post. It’s still the case that nobody’s really said anything about it. This means one of two things: 1) it doesn’t look abnormal and maybe even kind of suits me, or 2) it looks stupid and everybody I know is too...
June 2011
6 posts
Seven days post-shave.
I had my first comment on my facial hair today. Anna said a simple ‘patchy face!’ as she was leaving my house this evening. She normally says something far earlier than this, so I’m amazed this is the first time I’ve had someone mention it.
Anyway, as requested, here’s a photo of the current state of my face. The hair looks way darker on camera. I shaved my cheeks a...
Six days post-shave.
This is normally the point where I go: ‘This is ridiculous now, off it comes’ and shave. But I kept going, BECAUSE I’M DEDICATED TO THE CAUSE.
I nearly did get rid of the sex-offender-like moustache I’m currently rocking, as I had to go into town for a few things and always like to look my best. Today I definitely did not look my best, and that was mainly due to my...
Five days post-shave
My face-fuzz was getting particularly scruffy yesterday morning, so I shaved a little around the edges to tidy it up. This left me with a faint goatee shape, and some scruffy sideburns which creep onto my cheeks. It was also making its way down my neck in spectacular patches.
Work was hectic and warm, which probably added to growth, but I didn’t receive any comments.
In the evening, we...
Four days post-shave.
Very hot indeed today. I sat in the garden reading Submarine and I could practically feel the sunlight being converted into hair on my face.
Current beard status is a similar length to yesterday, but it seems darker and is definitely more noticeable. No comments yet, but I’ve had it far longer and more ridiculous than this, so they’re probably still to come.
I have work from 10-3...
Beard status, three days post-shave.
I can’t grow a full beard, it grows in weird patches and that frustrates me. I don’t necessarily want a full beard, I’d just like the option of a beard. I have a week of doing nothing ahead of me, so I’m going to hold off shaving for that week to see how it goes. I expect my face to look like a scraggly cat with clumps of hair falling out, like you may see on an RSPCA ad....
'Do you wanna play a mildly annoying game?'
I’ve seen Saw, Saw 2, Saw 3 and Saw 5. I didn’t deliberately skip 4, I just really didn’t like 3 and then 5 was on TV. I didn’t get what was going on at all. Anyway, if this Saw-related blog is inaccurate, that’s why.
The series seemed to dwindle in popularity after the third one. I’m amazed that it made it all the way to a seventh, because I have no idea who...
May 2011
9 posts
Watchsirmitchell:
I was not expecting it.
I love sloths. I love R Kelly. I am drunk. a;jrnvaliryvbakhrbvckayr
witsandwings asked: What books can you recommend for reading? I've been going through classics - Jane Eyre, Pride and Prejudice, 1984, To Kill A Mockingbird... What am I missing?
witsandwings asked: You're going towards English Lit - do they ever discuss foreign literature?
1 tag
The Perfect Exam
I have two exams sitting between me and the completion of my English degree. This Friday and next Thursday, I have to venture into the sports hall for three hours each, and blitz papers on nineteenth century and modernist literature, respectively. Then it’s all over.
I have been working for my exams, but a law of revision is that everything is more interesting. Considering all of these...
April 2011
13 posts
Apparently you can ask me questions now. →