So last night I went out for a christmas night out with my work mates. Since I’d just returned from Uni the day before, it was the first time I’d seen most of them since the summer. There were a couple of new guys too and they were all really cool. After an awesome meal at a chinese restaurant I’d never heard of, we went out for drinks. I’d consumed the best part of five pints of Carlsberg before we decided to move from Wetherspoons to another pub.
My mouth was dry and tasted pretty foul because of all the beer, so I trotted up to the bar to get some water before we left. I was served by a good looking girl of about my age who asked to see my ID even though I didn’t want any alcohol. I asked for half a pint of water and she sarcily came back with:
'Ooh, are you sure you can't handle a whole pint?'
WHAT. WHAT. I laughed a lot at this cheekiness and told a couple of my colleagues who also found it hilarious. We finished up and moved on.
I withdrew some cash shortly after before moving into Robin’s Well at the bottom of town. Completely forgetting this withdrawel, I convinced myself that I only had £4 to last me the rest of the night. At the bar, I asked the bartender (who had just told me that I, at 21, look way younger that Chris, who is 19) what I could get for £2. He told me that VKs were £1.99, so I went for that. He smirked. I was pleased with the choice though as it gave me a chance to get rid of the horrible beer flavour still haunting my mouth.
I finished my first VK and returned to the bar. This time a girl served me. I asked for another VK. She laughed and grabbed it from the fridge before saying:
'Do you want some balls with that?'
I said ‘what?’ and she replied ‘Do you want anything else with that?’ At this point, it clicked what she had said. I laughed, hung my head in shame and went back to my colleagues, sipping away at my VK. When THAT one was finished, I decided I needed cash. As I was about to leave, my boss, Dave, said ‘didn’t you just get cash?’ I looked in my wallet and was delighted to find the tenner I had withdrawn not twenty minutes ago. I go to the bar again and am served by the same girl.
I explained to her that I had only bought VKs because I thought I had no money, but it turned out that I did! She told me that Carlsberg was only £1.90. I tell her I didn’t know that and wanted to buy a manly drink to make up for it. She said ‘Oh, manly eh? Fancy going for a tropical one this time?’ I laughed and asked what a good manly drink was; another bartender replied ‘WHISKEY. STRAIGHT.’ I pulled a face and just asked for Budweiser, even though I don’t really like Budweiser.
I told my workmates the story and they all agreed that I need to man up.