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I got a package in the post the other day.

It was a STUFFED TIGER. As in like, a toy. It wasn’t a taxidermy delivery. I’m not sure taxidermists even deliver. Anywho, it looks like this: 

Grr. Cute eh? And why did someone send me a cuddly tiger? Because I’m too nice.

No, really. Too nice.

I was approached by a WWF charity mugger type a month ago and, since I’m too polite to just ignore people, I chatted to her. She asked if I had heard of the WWF; I said ‘Yeah, it’s the wrestlers, right?’ and she was very kind to laugh. She told me that I can donate a couple of pounds via text to get some trees planted for some tigers. I thought it was a fair deal, so I sent the text.

A few days later, I started getting calls from the WWF. This had happened to me before; I sent a text for another charity once and they called me asking to set up a direct debit. I told the WWF it wasn’t a good time and saved their number. That same number popped up every night for a month, and I ignored it every time.

Then, my phone had a mental breakdown and I had to delete my contacts. The next day, a call came through from an unrecognised number. Since I was expecting calls from jobs and other things, I answered. Of course, it was the WWF.

The girl on the phone was very friendly indeed. She said that she too had just completed a degree in English Lit and Creative Writing, so we talked about that for ages. Then, somehow, we got talking about middle names, and she guessed that mine was ‘Sauron’. Made me chuckle.

But eventually she had to get down to business and asked if I wanted to sponsor a tiger. £4 a month she told me and I fumbled out some excuse about not having a solid income. But I felt like I was letting down a new friend! Eventually I agreed to a £3 a month tiger. I dunno the difference, maybe this one is a bit mangey.

So I sponsored a tiger because people are nice to me and I’m programmed to be nice back. Of course, I’m probably not the only person like this and the girl on the phone knows that. She became my friend to get me to sponsor a tiger! I feel a little betrayed.

I’ll probably cancel the direct debit after a couple of months. I’m happy to give money to charity every now and then, but I feel like I’ve been pressured into it.

Basically what’s happened here is I’ve bought a tiger teddy in a very complicated manner. I need to learn how to say no to nice people!